Many years ago, I was on retreat with many people, not just clergy. As we got to know each other, and as the director got to know us, we learned that we all shared something in common: we believed that we were all coming up short as far as becoming good enough disciples of the Lord. No one felt that they were perfect enough, which was the quiet feeling everyone felt, but found it hard to admit. Everybody either assumed or learned earlier in life that to get closer to God we were required to go beyond our own human limitations, unable to accept ourselves as we really were. After the kind and wise retreat director brought this to light for us, he smiled wryly and said: “Do you know what true faith is? It is to accept God’s acceptance of us.” And then he added, and to accept yourself just the way you have been made in God’s image and likeness. In today’s 2^nd reading to the Romans, St. Paul instructs the disciples that when you love another person, you must start by loving yourself. For if you don’t start loving yourself first, you won’t fully love your neighbor. Paul makes a powerful follow-up: he says this is the whole law! Wow! As disciples, we seek many lesser laws while omitting this major one. You can’t imagine how many times I have heard people saying to me with great fear things like: “Father, I missed Mass last Sunday because I was sick in bed. Is that a mortal sin?” We’ve embraced a fear-based approach to God; not one of Him being our loving Father. This past week we celebrated the feast of the great St. Augustine who learned the hard way in his own life that love of neighbor and of self, was the foundation of our love for God. With great sadness toward the end of his life he wrote his apology to God: “Late have I loved thee, O Beauty ever ancient, ever new, late have I loved you!... You breathed Your fragrance on me; I drew in breath and now I pant for you. I have tasted You, now I hunger and thirst for more. You touched me, and I burned for your peace.” Does this sound like a demanding Father, or a lover who hungers for God’s love? I pray that one day we soon grasp this message and toss away our perfectionism. I hope we don’t wait until our spiritual life ages us out!    

~ Fr.John